In today’s podcast, your host Sam Falsafi and Warrior Guest Jesse Ewell discuss the Warrior’s Blueprint for Leadership – how it all begins with becoming a Leader within one’s own home. Jesse has learned how to do this along with Sam through listening to the Voice within, which some may know it as the Spirit, intuition, or that gut feeling.
Parable #1: You Will Fuck Up
- Jesse’s path to Warrior began with some videos posted on Facebook by some of his fitness buddies. He found himself compelled to view the videos in secret, like someone watching porn. During the application process, Jesse waited over three hours to have a phone interview with Garrett, thinking that the waiting game was some sort of a Warrior test. A follow up phone call from Sam over two months later revealed they had fucked up.
- Jesse learned from his wife’s counselor that she was on the verge of a nervous breakdown, stemming from her fear of communicating her feelings to Jesse. Sam, having fucked up with his wife during a recent fight, had a dream where she was receiving advice from another man and recognized this as a sign that he is not hearing his wife.
You have all of these checklists for being a good husband and father – but at the end of the day, are you really hearing your wife? Are you really hearing your kids? Are you hearing the Voice within and taking immediate action?
Parable #2: Beautiful Actions Must Follow Beautiful Words
- If, in your world, you are listening to beautiful words that aren’t being backed up by actions, you are being fuckin’ lied to. You can fall in love with the beauty of the words, only to miss out on the beauty of the actions, one day finding yourself fucked up the ass where you continue blaming others – because you choose to tune in to this particular sound wave and ignore the pain.
- We don’t give ourselves permission to fail, so we wear this fucking mask. We come home, take off the mask and blow up on our loved ones. Why? Because we consider this a safe place to fail. Warrior Week was designed to interrupt these fucking patterns.
What beautiful actions are you taking today that are following your beautiful words?
Parable #3: The Truth Is Revealed Inside The Pit
- About an hour into Warrior Week, it hit Jesse that his reason for being there had nothing to do with his business (which he had lied about in the first pace), and everything to do with his wife and family. Inside the Pit, he felt his wife’s pain, he felt his pain, and he also felt there was a way of working himself out of the Pit.
- Jesse returned home and started living the Warrior’s Way at the highest level. Living the Warrior’s Way in his household became non-negotiable and his family lived it through him, taking on the Warrior life and language. For seven months they experienced their own version of Warrior Week – massive growth, change, and pain.
In what areas of your life are you lying to yourself and to others, that if you started telling the truth, you would begin seeing your life turn around?
Parable #4: Be Willing To Sit In The Pain Of The Pit
- As we begin to march inside our own Pit for the first time, we are actually giving ourselves permission to be in this unknown dark place. We don’t know how wide this place is, we don’t know the depth of it, and we stop at the first place in the Pit. It hurts so much that we are paralyzed, unable to go further and explore the Pit.
- Courage and certainty were injected into Jesse between WW 16 and WW 21 because he had done the work, which gave him a different experience inside of the Pit in WW 21. He realized there was a depth he hadn’t reached during his first Warrior Week and was able to see two versions of himself inside the Pit. The second time it was more about finding his Purpose inside of the Pit.
What are the gifts you have received by giving yourself permission to go inside your Pit?
Parable #5: Serve and Lead Your Family First
- Coach Sam: There is a Purpose in serving your family first. HAVE YOU DISCOVERED THAT? If you haven’t, you have no business going all across the world and serving somebody else. SERVICE BEGINS AT HOME. Jumping over the Pain to go deeper to find your Purpose is nothing but a False Lift – you lift yourself up only to feel better, look better and be seen as better.
- So many men go throughout life never asking their wife and kids if they’re a good husband or daddy. They’re fearful of the answers and don’t want to face the pain of the answers they know they will hear. Chances are, your family is afraid to tell you how they really feel.
- Ask your wife tonight: Am I a good husband? Ask your kids tonight: Am I a good daddy? What does it actually mean to your wife to be a good husband? What does it mean to your kids to be a good daddy?
Parable from the Pit:
“Do you have the courage – do you have the fucking balls – to ask your wife and kids and truly hear their feedback? Ask every day, ask as much as you want. Ask and let them tell their truth. If it hurts, accept that and find the power on the other side of the pain by making some actionable changes.”
– Coach Sam Falsafi
“If your wife and kids say nothing, then there’s a fear inside of them to tell you the truth. Once you ask them this question, you have to shut the fuck up. You have to let them speak, and you just have to sit there and listen and take it. That is how you have to show up inside of this.”
-Coach Jesse Ewell